An Open Letter to the Vermont Chamber of Commerce

April 22, 2009

Vermont Chamber of Commerce
P.O. Box 37
Montpelier, VT 05601-0037

Dear Esteemed Directors and Staff:

Thank you for your thoughtful consideration of my recent public epistolary appeal to your uber-improv native sons, Phish. Although I received no official response from your organization (in fact, I did not hope for it - I only wanted the Chamber to help expedite my letter), I did receive thoughtful commentary from a member of your staff. That type of humanity and dedication to the job is something of which any organization ought to be proud.

It was with sincere regret and sadness that I learned Phish is not actually a member of the Vermont Chamber of Commerce. Although I have had no experience with your particular association, from what I understand the Chamber is the "guy-behind-the-guy" for the businesses of the state. I expect that kind of influence can draw some serious bad vibes, so I am sending good energy your way and will ask my friends to do the same.

Anyway, w/r/t to our own heroes, Phish, I can only surmise that their spurning of the VCoC is a product of some kind of holier-than-thou, stick-it-to-those-corporate-fatcats, down-with-capitalism balderdash. Full disclosure: I have stuck it to a few fatcats in my day. I once subscribed to Z Magazine and I may have carelessly subscribed to the Campus Socialist listserv back in college. But that was college, yes? I mean, we all did a few crazy things on campus and hardly anyone even knew what a listserv was back then. But I've really grown up. These days I well understand the importance of business boosters.

For our mutual benefit, I did a little research. It turns out, not only has Phish chosen not to support the Chamber, they appear to have only one corporate entity registered in Vermont. Despite originating in the green-mountain state, they seem to have fled with most of their limited liability status into the arms of that cooze of the corporate world: Delaware. I found the following listings for Delaware corporations:

FILE NUMBER	ENTITY NAME
2291015	PHISH, INC.
2357632	PHISH MAIL ORDER, INC.
2343854	PHISH MERCHANDISING, INC.
4260148	PHISH SMART INC.
3915488	PHISHX LLC

Needless to say, this is a very troubling state of affairs (you'll forgive this pun, I'm sure): on one hand showing scorn for the ample bosom of the Chamber, while at the same time shacking up in Delaware - a state that shamelessly plugs its corporate laws as "modern and flexible". Et tu, Phish? They have rather unflattering words to describe aging men who flee their home for something modern and flexible, you know. And please, skip that rap about Delaware's great Court of Chancery - we all know what you are really after.

Before I close, I guess I should take this opportunity to issue a correction. The scalping site owned by Ticketmaster is TicketsNow.com, not Stubhub.com. To Stubhub.com, I sincerely apologize for stating previously that you were associated with Ticketmaster - per your certified letter, I will immediately cease and desist. However, with regard to the specific claims therein, I would posit that habeas corpus still stands for something. See Perry v. Stop 'n' Believe Inn, 7 Del. 316 (1980).

Anyway, I have yet to receive Phish's reply and am anxiously awaiting same. In the event I succeed in gaining an audience with someone with management authority over at their organization, I will certainly raise the issue of their nonparticipation in the VCoC and keep you up to date on any progress vis-a-vis a possible future membership.

I look forward to a time when our paths may cross again. In the meantime, I remain always

your faithful servant,

Ryan White